I am such a dummy...

[cah1470]

From: Vikki 
Sent: Wednesday, September 20, 2006 12:33 PM 
To:cah1470 
Subject:TODAY 
Corey had a rough day yesterday; when I picked him from Another Day; the guy Courtney (his Mon-Tues one on one person) was so upset w/Corey; I guess they had a pretty rough time. Corey was acting up pretty bad, scratching, and hitting the walls /car kind of day; but this morning he was much better. I sure hope that Dr. Geyer will be able to help him out. Wanted to give you the update. Help me remember to call SSI. 
By the way, when I tell you things like Corey had a rough day, etc..don't let that upset you, because you know better than anyone about his ups/downs; but I will always report to you how he is doing. 
Vikki 

Of course when Vikki called last night and asked me if I wanted her to pick Corey up I said no. I said no for several reasons, the 1st being I am so afraid of him wearing out his welcome. I mean what in the world will I do if I lose Vikki? 2nd, I really did miss Corey he had been home Fri, Sat, and Sun and was great. He didn't bang the walls, kick, or scratch the entire time. He had spent 4 days away last week, Mon at Don's and Tues at Vikki's. So I figured I would let him stay home tonight. Of course the minute I told her he was fine and hung up the phone Corey started doing all of the above. He was up until well after 1:00 screaming and crying the whole time. I used to complain about him staying up but now I would give anything to go back to the nights of him being awake but quiet in his room. Now he is awake and screaming, kicking, punching holes in the walls and doors, going in Cam's room turning on the light and the tv to wake him up.

I am SO worried about Corey. I mean genuinely worried. What is going to happen when he is an adult if he continues these behaviors? I can't keep him with me forever. I am so afraid that he will start all that with the wrong person and get hurt. And the worst part is I don't have any idea what it will take to fix things. After 14 years I still don't have any real answers on what to do. Not from the school, his case manager, or his doctors. I am just at the point where I want someone to give me the answer. Not the answer for him to be "normal" because I understand that he is autistic. But the answer on how to stop the behaviors. Like cut out the dairy, or a medication, or I don't know rubbing his belly. I don't care, just an answer...

Comments

[nstig8r.livejournal.com]

not being able to help your child has got to be one of the hardest things to deal with. i know if there were an answer you would be the one who could find it.

[(Anonymous)]

OH I can just sense your frustration. It's so hard isn't it? For so long I really thought my son was autistic. For the record he isn't. But he had a lot of behavior that you describe with Corey. I would just cry and want answers. Just an answer to figure out how to cope.

HUGS!!!!

Oblivion

[cah1470.livejournal.com]

Yes I am frustrated and worried. I mean this is not just hard for me, it's about my son's life, his future. I feel like the school, his doctor, even his case manager are just going through the motions. But the bottom line is long after they have moved on corey will need some resolution for these behaviors. I guess you can see it has been on of "those" weeks for me.

Thanks for the comment.